Wherever you look right now, people are in the goal frenzy. But that feels somehow normal in early January.
Yet, the tides change in February when many already get off track and eventually stop. And thus fail their goals.
And of course, we got the bunch of people who never even started.
But why does that happen? And how can you prevent that?
The answer is simple to explain but not necessarily simple to implement. I’ve talked before in the newsletter and in Unlock Your Mind about the elements needed for change.
Reaching your goal is the same. It’s essentially a form of change as you have to change much in your behavior to reach it.
Our current self can’t reach those goals. Something must change to make it possible.
Take losing weight for example. If your current self could reach your goal of losing 20 pounds, kilograms, or whatever your preferred measurement is, be it elephant feet, or face masks, you wouldn’t be in your fatty situation.
So, for losing those wobbling masses, we must change something. Namely, us. More precisely, our behavior.
Our daily behavior makes or breaks everything.
We know that and people start with change but then struggle again because they fight with their subconsciousness and eventually fail.
That’s a battle you can’t win. Don’t fight your subconsciousness, make it an alley instead.
Now, how could we do that?
I’ve found 2 key elements for successful change and they have nothing to do with any tactics, to-do lists, motivation, or alike.
To get your mind on board, you need to have a compelling reason for achieving the goal and the goal itself must be appealing to pull you.
I call it push and pull.
The push is something to get you moving at all. It’s must be strong enough to move you from chilling on the couch to working on the steps towards your goal like writing a newsletter, publishing a blog, building your Sass, etc.
It doesn’t need to be positive. I believe negative ones work even better like getting out of a shitty job situation. Things where you continue to suffer and the only solution is to work on your goal to get out of it.
In my case of going independent, the push is the last employee job I had, and that I don’t want to work in the project business in large corps and teams again. I don’t want to be at the will of others. The thoughts of going back is scary enough to push me.
Every single time.
Find your push aka reason and you’ll have half of the power at your side.
Next, the pull.
The goal itself must have a huge force to pull you in like a black hole that sucks in everything else.
Quite often it is not that was we think is our goal but something behind it.
The typical money goal aka getting rich is a great example of this. People often set their goals to make X amount of money and then still fail.
The reason is simple again. The goal was the wrong one.
They weren’t pursuing the money itself for the sake of money. They were pursuing what the money could offer them like living on their own terms, have 3 months long vacations a year, traveling, and alike.
If your real goal is many vacations, you should aim for that and not the wrong one called money. Of course, in the end, you will need money but maybe not that much as you think.
Also, when aiming for the wrong thing, the pull is not happening.
That’s for example why money goals do not really work for me. Money is nice and it helps me a lot but it is not the ultimate goal. Nope, my goal is living independently on my terms, spending my time with family when I want and not being stuck in a job 8 hours a day, 5 days a week.
Chances are high that your current goal is not your real goal. So, steps aside and look behind.
Now you got the push and pull.
2 forces moving you in the direction of your goal.
What’s our push and pull?